Immediately after Adam and Eve fell into sin, God set up His Rules as to How the marriage would be organized. In Genesis 3:16, God addressed Eve first. In verse 16, “Unto the woman he said…

1) “I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children;”
This first result of sin on Eve and her future posterity would be pain in the child-bearing process; in the gestation period even to birth. This truth can be verified by any female that has been implanted with life in a seed in her womb and has brought that life through the birth canal to the light of day.

2) “And thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.”
This desire is not first sexual, but the idea of subjection to the husband. This is placed in the heart of every woman by God. It is her natural position. She is created from conception until death to fill this position as the man’s help meet; to be his body; with the husband guiding and directing her as her head. Therefore, in Genesis 3:16, God sets the order of organization for the marriage, headship and submission.

Paul makes the doctrine of headship very plain in the New Testament:

“But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.” (1 Corinthians 11:3)

“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” (Ephesians 5:22)

“For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.” (Ephesians 5:23)

“Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” (Ephesians 5:24)

“Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.” (1 Timothy 2:11)

“But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.” (1 Timothy 2:12)

“For Adam was first formed, then Eve.” (1 Timothy 2:13)

As also does Peter:

“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands…” (1 Peter 3:1)

“For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:” (1 Peter 3:5)

“Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.” (1 Peter 3:6)

These verses plainly teach that the husband is the head and the wife is the body. She is to be in subjection to her head.

However, there are rules set by God for the husband to follow toward his wife and the wife to her husband.

The Husband’s Actions as Head of the Home:

1) Ephesians 5:25, 28-31: “Husbands, love your wives…

“Even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;” (verse 25b)

“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies…” (verse 28)

“…nourisheth and cherisheth it (the wife)…” (verse 29)

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother…and they two shall be one flesh (unity, oneness).” (verse 31)

2) 1 Peter 3:7: “Likewise, ye husbands…

“Dwell with them according to knowledge,

“Giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life…”

3) The next verse (1 Peter 3:8) applies to husband and wife:

“Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:”

The Wife’s Actions as the Body to the Head:

1) Ephesians 5:22-24:

“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” (verse 22)

“For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.” (verse 23)

“Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” (verse 24)

2) 1 Timothy 2:11:

“Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.” (The woman learns in subjection; she does not teach men; she is silent.)

3) Titus 2:4-5: “That they may teach the young women…

“To be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,” (verse 4)

“To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands….” (verse 5)

4) 1 Peter 3:1-6:

“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;” (1 Peter 3:1)

“While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.” (1 Peter 3:2)

“Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;” (1 Peter 3:3)

“But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.” (1 Peter 3:4)

“For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:” (1 Peter 3:5)

“Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.” (1 Peter 3:6)

All of these Scriptures concerning the Procedure of A Godly Home are revealed in four words:

1. Headship
2. Submission
3. Love
4. Design

Positions have nothing to do with talents or intellect or strength. But they have to do with God’s order for the home to function as Christ and His Bride, the Church, are to function.

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.” (Ephesians 5:31)

“This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.” (Ephesians 5:32)

When God’s Procedure for the Home is compromised and disobeyed; the result is confusion, division, strife, loss of the blessings (the blessings of a Godly marriage that is in obedience to God’s commands for marriage), divorce, and destruction (Galatians 6:7-8).

In today’s marriages the problem is either ignorance to God’s instruction for marriage, or they are in rebellion to God’s assigned position and duties of the same.

Women that are in rebellion to headship are in a constant battle to undo Genesis 3:16; which God set up and not man. Men that are in rebellion to headship do not want to face their God-given responsibility to be the head of the wife and family because it requires them to submit to God and obey God’s Word toward their wives. It forbids their adulterous and fornicating heart from its pleasure of sin for a season. It restricts them and causes them to be single-eyed to their wife; to honor, consider, and respect their wife; and it takes away their selfish desires and goals.

The problem in today’s homes and marriages is primarily the husband’s lack of obedience to the Lord in His Instructions on marriage. He is the leader in the home; and God is holding him responsible for his household.

The deception placed upon marriages today is greater than it ever has been. This is manifested in the rebellion of wives to their husbands. The reason of their rebellion is because the husbands do not understand and follow Christ’s teachings of Ephesians 5:21-33. Men today do not fear God’s judgment upon their sins.

This deception tells men that it is okay to follow the dictates of the flesh, which involves the lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, and the pride of life. It tells men that the Bible is old school or old fashioned. It tells men that the Ten Commandments pertained to the Old Testament Jews primarily. It points out that Christ did not have the woman caught in the very act of adultery put to death, as she would have been in the Old Testament; for now we are under grace; therefore, adultery must be acceptable to God.

However, the Ten Commandments have not been abrogated (abolished) by Christ; but fulfilled in Christ. The moral law of God is still the rule of society as it has always been and shall always be. Adultery and fornication are sins against the body (1 Corinthians 6:9-20); the temple of God must be kept pure, or God will destroy it (1 Corinthians 3:16-17). The procedure of marriage as outlined by God will harness immorality; stop STD’s (sexually transmitted diseases) in marriages; give order in the home and in society as a whole; and bring honor to God, and spiritual and physical blessings to the marriage union.

When the procedures (laws or rules) for any organization or relationship are not followed – there is confusion, division, and destruction. When there are no procedures or laws – there is lawlessness; there is mass confusion; and finally there is total destruction.

“Today is the age of the woman.” This great deception has taken women out of their God-ordained position and placed them in a man’s position; and this is happening world-wide. This has placed the husband and wife in opposite roles. When this happens in a marriage, the husband and wife have set themselves up – not for the Blessings of God – but for the Judgment of God.

This deception has bled into every area of society today – the government; the business world; the manufacturing world; and lastly, but most importantly, it is now prevalent in Christian marriages.

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